Posts Tagged ‘sock’

There’s been a change in the wind this year. Something in the water? I don’t know. But it is a shift.

Blocky Pink Cardi

Getting things done. Not letting things languish. Finishing what I start. It’s kind of nice and feels a lot like moving forward. Moving out of Culver City and up to the Fortress Of Solitude (aka Casa Fabulous) was a real kick in the pants. I registered for college, three weeks into the semester and I am doing well in my classes. I think I can. I know I can. I am. It’s here. It’s now. I started.

I signed up for yoga. I signed up for 8 weeks of bellydance. I decided I wanted to do and live and be rather than have a lot of plans and unfinished business, and then I went out and began to do.

I’ve struggled with crippling depression on and off for my whole life, and I don’t know what’s shifted in the last year, but I don’t feel like I’m struggling quite so hard anymore. Maybe it’s just that I’ve accepted certain limitations and so I don’t spin my wheels in the deep soft sand now. I find the places where I can get traction, where I can move, and I focus there.

I still spend huge swaths of time alone, quiet, nurturing my need for down time. But I’ve learned that it is possible to get out and do, around those islands of solitude. In fact, it may even be that it is necessary to get out and do, to balance the quiet.

Loksins detail

Things seem more in focus. I feel pretty good. I think I’m actually pretty happy, though it’s hard to quantify because it isn’t a feeling I’m really used to. But I think that’s what this is.

Callie Cardi start

It is a lot of work this being happy. It takes effort. I have to kick my own arse a lot of the time to get that stuff on the calendar, get in the car, get it done, to do. Maybe that’s the point. Maybe that stuff isn’t supposed to be easy and the point is to make it work anyway. I have no idea. I just know, it seems to be working.

It feels a lot less like trying not to fall off of a tightrope and a lot more like easily walking across something a little more substantial. Actual rocks under my feet. Stepping stones that stay where I put them. I don’t want to get too cocky because that is when you fall down, and I don’t want to fall down… but I feel like maybe, I won’t fall down? If that makes sense.

Of course the beautiful thing about depression is, you don’t trust it for a minute and you’re always looking out for that thing that’s going to knock you on your keister, right?

I’m trying not to go there. And just keep walking forward.

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Things are heating up here in the San Gabriel Valley and I don’t mean temperature. I mean, I’m getting BUSY.

There has been a lot of driving about, proving residency, getting permits and applying to our school of choice in the new district. We don’t want to go to our home zoned school – the state took it over last year. If Gov. S can’t make a budget, I don’t want him in charge of my daughter’s HS education. That is for the youngest. The oldest is going to homeschool her final year of high school, and take classes at the local junior college concurrently. Actually, because she has taken extra courses all along, and because she’s met all but 4 senior requirements and passed her CAHSEE, she’ll be graduating in December. Her second term at college in the spring will be her first term as a fully fledged college student, a full semester early.

Go girl!

I am really hoping she will parley this into admission as a junior at a local state uni and continue until she earns a BA, but she has some hare-brained plan to “travel the world!” after graduating with her AA degree in Graphic Arts, then move to Canada and finish her BA up there as a guest of the folks who brought you the Yarn Harlot.

I am also registered in college classes this fall. With any luck I’ll be applying to nursing school in about 3 semesters, once I get a few math, chemistry and bio classes out of my way.

Anyone know a good algebra tutor in the SGV?

On Monday, one of the cats sprouted massive allergies, swelled up, got scabby, explosive in all the wrong ways, and had to be rushed to the vet. He is okay, though we’re still not sure what he’s allergic to. At $400, I will not be running the blood panel to find out. A shot of steroids, an overnight in the hospital, fluids and some special hypoallergenic food will hopefully help. Between Senor Scabbersons, the kitten and the other two cats all needing their own special snowflake food, breakfast time is exciting around here now.

And of course… knitting.

blocky cardi

The blocky pink baby cardi is coming along nicely. The other front panel is going to be a darker pink, with contrasting pockets and sleeve bands on each front panel to tie them together. The button band, neck and hem will all be that pale pink. I think it will be very modular and cute when it’s done.

I am also really enjoying the Loksins! pattern. Lace socks are always a lot of fun and knit up so quickly.


I am knitting this one up in Dream in Color Smooshy. The charted parts are extremely simple and fast. I got this pattern from a secret pal a few rounds back and am finally getting to enjoy the knit. A great on the go sock!

And now I’m off to help #1 Daughter get sorted for her college assessment tests, and then to go buy birthday presents for #2 Daughter, who turns 14 tomorrow and expects something wrapped in ribbons to commemorate the occasion.

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